Being in a relationship is a wonderful thing, but it’s important to understand that it’s not always going to be smooth sailing. To really make a relationship work and stand the test of time, it takes work on both ends. If you’ve just recently broken up with your girlfriend but feel like it’s still not over, perhaps it’s time for you to try to get her back to see if, with a bit of work, you can actually make things work out this time. We’re here to help you out and give you 6 tips on how to rekindle a relationship with your ex-girlfriend.

1.   Get Rid of That Ego

The first step towards winning your girlfriend back is to take a step back and assess yourself, as well as what may have gone wrong the first time around. The only way you’re going to be able to do this effectively is if you swallow your pride and look past your ego, so you can actually figure out what happened. Imagine you’re an indifferent person looking in on the relationship, and walk yourself through it, and see what you can do to actually make it work this time. Always remember that placing blame won’t help anything and has never helped a relationship work out under any circumstance. You need to go about this in a healthy way where you’re both humble and willing to work on yourselves as well as one another.

2.   Test the Waters

There’s no point in trying to make something work if she’s no longer interested to begin with. This is why you need to figure out whether she still cares or not. You can ask mutual friends, or look into different attempts to win her back, like maybe running into her and seeing if she reacts at all to you talking to another girl. Don’t take it too far though, because you don’t want to push her away, you just need to make sure that she still cares and has feelings for your before you move forward to try to open this chapter again.

3.   Make More of Effort to be a Better Listener

One thing that is bound to destroy any relationship is not taking the time to actually hear your partner out. Chances are, one of the reasons you guys didn’t work out in the first place is because you weren’t attentive enough or your never listened or remembered things that were important to her. If you really want to win her over, work on becoming a more patient listener and actually take note of the things that matter to her, even if you don’t have the same perspective. This will help you grow a great deal and teach you how to appreciate these differences.

4.   There’s No Such Thing as Too Much Gratitude

There is never a time in any situation where a person does not appreciate gratitude. When you consistently show your girlfriend that you appreciate who she is and what she does and also what she aspires to be, this will only create a new found respect between the both of you. You’ll be able to explore new grounds together based on a stronger foundation or appreciation and respect.

5.   Balance Giving Space & Doing Things Together

One of the main culprits of a failed relationship is the lack of balance. People are either too suffocating or aren’t attentive enough, so the key here is to find the perfect balance. The only way you’re going to be able to do this is by ensuring that you both trust one another. This way, you’ll both be able to have your own lives separately so that you still have a sense of identity and independence, and also be able to enjoy each other’s company, share experiences, and create memories together.

6.   Do a Better Job with Forgiveness & Growth

If you want a strong relationship that stands the test of time, you’ll know that the second time around, you need to do a better job with the concept of forgiveness. Learn to pick your battles, and learn that the battles can also be talked out if you just take the time to see what exactly happened. You need to aim for growth in your relationship, and a big part of that is all about forgiveness.

If you feel like your time is not done with your ex-girlfriend, then use the advice given here and get out there and win her back. Life is all about second chances, change and growth, and it’s something that you don’t want to have to wonder about later on down the line just because you didn’t want to take the risk.